In the wake of an uncomfortable night spent in a sleeping bag on my livingroom floor, I’m a little the worse for wear. I slept little and badly due mainly to feeling cold most of the night. I couldn’t face climbing out of the sleeping bag to snatch an overcoat, so I put up with it. What, you may ask, was I doing sleeping on the floor?
Well, when we went to go to bed at 00:15, having watched The Last Samurai on TV, we discovered that the ceiling above the bed had a long bead of heavy water drops which were busily saturating the duvet, sheets and mattress beneath, rendering us bedless and sending me into the attic in my pyjamas armed with a torch that didn’t want to stay on in search of a solution. It turned out that the recently installed Velux window in the still partially-slated roof was not properly sealed, and the deluge (which MET Eireann had totally failed to predict - what’s new?) was doing its best to imitate the Niagara falls through the resulting holes. I spent nearly an hour chasing drips of varying flow-intensity with pots, pans, plastic containers of all kinds, and a casserole dish in an attempt to stop the mini-waterfall onto our bed below.
Fortunately, there was a large sheet of flooring ply just under the Velux in the otherwise floorless attic. Balancing on the cross beams in my cork slippers was a challenge at times, and I slipped once and very nearly drove my foot through the ceiling below. Having chased down all the drips and chastised them with a growing army of kitchen utensils and other vessels of a vaguely household nature, I went to sleep on the floor of my living room.
Needless to say, I rang the roofer at 07:15 to apprise him of the situation, and he appeared soon after to tackle the mess.